Friday, December 30, 2005

Underneath your clothes

Underneath your clothes there is an endless story
There is a man I choose there is my territory
And all the things I deserve for being a good girl

I remember singing this song with my whole heart. I sort of believed in it. Naive as it may sound I think there is a woman who needs to be rescued in all of us. I finally decided to admit it to myself. Years of telling myself that I wasn't into the fairy tales and happy endings GONE. It feels good. It feels like I shed a coat that was matted to my skin. What now? I have no idea. I am going to play it by ear and see what life brings my way.

This year ends and a new one is being ushered in by the snow and the sleet. I am mesmerized by the pillowy effect it has on the land. I want to go and lay in it and make a snow angel. I want to laugh with the innocence of a child and twirl in a circle till I fall down dizzy. Where do we lose it? That pure feeling of happiness untarnished by the life. Keynaan mentions that it happens at birth with our first cry. Apparently the devil takes it upon himself to introduce pain to us ASAP. I am not sure I would agree all I know is that one moment you are a child and the next moment you become an adult.

There are many things I wish to address but now that I am writing I am not sure I want to talk about. They are boiling inside of me asking me to spew them for all to see but I swallow hard to keep them down. One day I am sure they will overcome my epiglotis. Who knows maybe I will feel the same way I feel in regards to the newfound vulnerable me. Maybe I will embrace it.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Mmmmmmmm share!

I still believe wholeheartedly in my prince charming.:)Cinderella has ruined a generation of girl's fantasies. *Sigh*